Hi, I’m a web page and I don’t even know it! If I don’t know that I’m a web page, then why did I say that I was? Maybe I’m not a web page. Maybe I’m not anything in particularI’m just something imagined by Mark Cidade [that's me! -Ed.]to represent this web page. But if I said, “Hi, I’m a representation of this web page!” then I would be a representation of the representation of the web page, and not the page itself! It’s hard to say what you are when you don’t actually exist. “Hi, I don’t exist” doesn’t quite cut it. Maybe the author of this paragraph is just being silly.

I guess language is meant to be used by anyone or anything other than the products (e.g., words) of the language itself. You can use language to talk about language and its products, like this paragraph for example, but it’s weird to make the words themselves fictional characters that talk about themselves, since they have to talk using language. It’s like having numbers solve math problems. Not number-people, I mean the same kind of numbers used in the math problems. But I guess that would be like having people come out of our mouths when we speak instead of sound waves.

I suppose that’s just one of many limitations, like Gödel’s incompleteness theorem which states that you can’t use any axiomatic system to prove that the system itself is true, even if you can use it to verify everything else. So if a system for proving things to be true or false can be used for everything except the system itself, it’s an incomplete system. Everything except one thing isn’t the same as everything. And to be complete, you need everything. I’d prove it if I could???

I wish there was a god so he can tell the cockroaches and other pests to leave us alone. And if there is a so-called God, then I wish he didn’t exist, because what was he smoking when he decided to create a world where cockroaches can thrive?

Gee, thanks God! Oh, and can we have some more viruses? I don’t think we have enough deadly viruses!

I wonder, of the people who actually read what I write on this site, how many of them actually understand what I’m saying? I don’t always understand what I’m talking about. All I know is that it makes sense. Or that it did at the time.

Funnyjust last month I wrote about the passage of time and now I don’t believe that there is such a thing as time. The perception of time is just how we interpret certain properties of the universe, in the same way we see colors in place of electromagnetic frequencies, hear sounds which are really waves of air pressure, smell odors which are actually based on the shapes of different molecules. What we think of time is just our constant motion forward in one direction along a line perpendicular to all three familiar dimensions of space. There really isn’t a before and after. It’s actually just what’s in front and what’s behind. We can’t see what’s up ahead (in the future) because there’s no light coming towards us from that direction. Everything in the universe is moving forward, including light. So we can only see the light that’s coming from behind usbehind us in time, that is. When you see the stars in the sky, you’re not only looking far into space. You’re seeing way back in time, too. Something that’s 100 light years away won’t be visible until the light coming from it hits your eye, 100 years later. Note that everything isn’t moving forward in time at the same rate. A particle of light doesn’t move along the line of time at all. From its point of view, it is created and destroyed at the same instance. The fastest you can possibly move forward in time is by standing still in space. By staying in one spot, you’re moving in a straight line in time. The faster you go in space (north, south, west, east, up, or down) the more diagonal your path is and the less forward in time you’ll be going. Your watch will tick (and you will age) slower than someone who’s moving at a lower speed. The effect is too small to measure, unless you’re on a Concorde or rocket or something.

How consciousness and cause and effect fit into this, I’m not exactly sure. I do have some ideas though. I’m still working on it!

You can eject me from your Eden only once.
Okay, maybe twice???

???my heart has fallen to an unfathomable depth???

Would I deprive myself of the very thing I want
On purpose?
I can think that I might
For as long as I am without the choice???

???I can only hope???
Not.

Your distance is crucial.
I don’t want to see
What’s not there
And what is instead.

I say that I don’t care
And it’s true
As long as you can’t tell
For as long as you can’t see???

???forever???
Or maybe just a long time.

And spare me your offerings.
You cannot be substituted.
I won’t let you off the hook that easily.
I wish it were so simple.
But, you see, by the very act of your giving,
The gift has become tainted.

When the winter is over I will stop
Hanging around the gates to the garden???

???In fact, I will run away???
As far as possible.

This is the best stab at the eternal question of piss shiver that I’ve seen so far. One day we will know for sure and will be better off??? somehow.