I used to be a superhero… now look at me; I’m just like everybody else. Maybe even worse off than everyone else. Wasted away by a horrible disease. Wasting my time. Wasted all my money.

I want my old friends, I want my old face, I want my old mind, fuck this time and place. Where did all that time go, anyway? What happened to all those people that I knew? I don’t care about every single person I aquainted myself with, but there’s a number of them that were important in some way. Whether they played a leading role in my life, or were an extra in the background, I miss them. I miss me. Where did my old self go anyway? That may very well be a rhetorical question, as I know where I went. It can all boil down to my sickness if I choose, and that would be perfectly valid. But maybejust maybeI wasn’t vigilant enough. I should have at least had a contingency plan. Even if I couldn’t forsee any possible need for it. Well, here I am now. I’m stuck real good this time. Ugh.

I haven’t touched my guitar much since last summer. The strings need to be changed. Even with the strings it has now, it’s still out of tune. I want my guitar to be in tune so I can hear it sing. I also want to hear myself sing. But not with how my voice is now, just as I don’t care to strum a guitar that’s out of tune. Yes, I know how to tune a guitar, but, but, but??? nevermind that.

I want to sing with my wonderful voice and my perfectly tuned guitar. I want to sing with others; for others. I want to be a part of a band and sing. Maybe even play rthym guitar. I want to sing great songs. Songs that I wrote, perhaps. Yes, I would like to write songs, too. Right now, though, I’d be happy with just knowing how to read musical notation.

There’s just something about my current Windows color scheme that I find striking, especially when I see the green selection on the blue menu. I’m like, “Wow!”. Maybe it’s the same blue-and-green thing that influence corporate logo designers. I’m not sure if the graphic below would give you the same response (displays set to 256 colors may not see it right). It may be when I’m moving my mouse over the menu and the green bar glides along with it. I also think that the toning down of the colors have something to do with it.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, January 17th, 2001 at 3:22 am and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.